JemmaWithaJ

So it's been the most stressful week of my life this week and its just the beginning. Pretty much me entire life has been a build up to me doing my teacher training. For as long as I can remember I've dreamt of being 'Miss'. As stressful as it's been, it made my stop and think about how much my mental heath has improved since applying to university nearly three years ago. I felt like I needed to get this post out there as I've seen so many people on social media expressing their worries about attending further education with mental health issues, primarily anxiety.  Everyone who knows me, In person, through my blog or through twitter knows I suffer with anxiety. So often I'm questioned when people see I'm in uni as to how the two impact on each other. In school, I was a little different, in college I was still a little different. Heck even now I'm a little bit different. However I couldn't always handle that. My final year of college (while a

Dear Diary.  Geography/life lessons.  I was pretty well behaved in school. Always did my work. Always finished first always did the extra work. I got really got grades in all subjects except one. Geography. Why? Because the things I learnt in geography we what got my through the last few years of high school. I didn't learn them from the teacher through. I kind of made a friend. Then failed my exam. I didn't care though. Who needs geography skills when every phone has GPS? Again, for the purpose of being able to follow this story line I've added a few pages together from over a few weeks. Enjoy! We got moved in geography today. Some sort of seating plan. I'm sat right at the back of the class next to a girl called G. Now yes I've told you about her before. Yes she's a bitch. But i think she's grown up. As you know my hair is BRIGHT ORANGE. Nobody really said anything all day but when we got to geography there were a few people in my class that hadn&

Welcome back to yet another Dear Diary post. I was going to post a few more lush reviews but after linking my blog to my social media account's I've actually had a few people ask me to post more from my diary, which never happens.  I've tried to be selective when picking pages to post online and I pondered about this one for a few days because I couldn't decide if it was too cringe. I wrote it up over a week ago and it's been sat in the drafts section since. However I giggled so much reading through it I thought it had to be shared! Thanks for coming back to read more! Enjoy... Dear Diary Today i went to kayaking club and we had to wear or swimming cosumes because we practice what to do if we call out. I wanted to go for ages but nobody would come. Me and K signed up together. I've never told you about her before but she's REALLY nice. Anyway we got changed quickly and were the only girls in there and when we ran outside she told me she was glad she didn

Dear Diary Yesterday my stupid school shoes broke so my stupid mum gave me stupid shoes and a stupid note to say my stupid brother kept her to stupid busy to stupid by me new stupid shoes so i wore stupid trainers and stupid pastorial took my stupid note and made me wear stupid daps. I HATE MY LIFE. I remember this and I had literally told my mother at 8o'clock on the morning of school that I'd broken me shoe the day before. I don't know what i expected her to do about it. For those who don't know, 'pastoral support' is what I mean by pastoral. It was an office with about 3 members of staff in that works there for the student to confide in. They would deal with issues like bullying, family trouble and apparently, was wear you get sent to swap your shoes for the day if you wore trainers. My trainers look like shoes !! more like shoes than those stupid daps!! I shouldnt have used that note nobody would have noticed!! Plus Pastorial are EFFIN MENTAL So i

Before I start, for those of you that followed my blog before I started by Dear Diary series, I promise this isn't the only content I'm going to post. I'm just really enjoying righting these and they're a great break from Uni work. It's been so nice to watch the page views hit such high numbers (For my blog at least) So thanks to everyone that's been sharing my post, or just coming back to read more. I've got hundreds of ages post so I'm really hoping to keep this up! Dear Diary  Soo school was pritty much the same as normal today boring and unproductive. For breakfast i had two bowls of cocopops because i really really hunry probably because of all the time i spent on the trapoline yesterday.  I wore plates to school today. (I mean plaits, please excuse the spelling)  I really likes them and mam spent AGES doing them. When i got to school nobody really said anything about them but at break I was in the queue and there were to o

Making friends with a saxophone. Everyone joins clubs in school right? Football club? Swimming? Hockey? It's a great way to make friends and become a part of something bigger than just yourself. I however, chose to learn to play the saxophone. I'd played the trumpet in primary school and felt I was finally ready for something bigger. No obviously, yanking this thing around school was impossible. The case was huge, chunky and damn right heavy. After a few weeks of suffering it was agreed that I could leave my Sax in the music room after my lesson, and leave the last lesson of the day 10 minutes early in order for me to go and collect it. This typically only took me two minutes which meant I was off schools groups 8 minutes early and home before the final bell rung. It was great! The thing that sucked for me was, I got to take a friend with me each time... Why is that a bad thing? Well.  Today was fun, I spent the hole time after school on the trampoline with (My brother)

Dear Diary.  So reading thought the selective pages I've chosen to publish i realised that i'd painted a pretty painful image of my life as a teen. It wasn't all bad. Some people were nice to me, and impacted on my school experience in ways they probably didn't even realise. There was one name that cropped up quite a lot when flicked through my second diary. So I thought i'd skip ahead for this post so you know it wasn't all bad. I didn't see this kid a lot. It was the odd class or passing in the halls. But he was 'popular' and nice to me. He didn't dare his friends to ask me out and then laugh when i said yes. He didn't ask me if i would 'sharpen his pencil' knowing full well I didn't know what it meant, and he didn't flick things into me hair without me knowing when he was sat behind me. He was just nice. I've stitched together a few different bit from a few different pages for the purpose of this post, because, like a

Preparing for my first day.  So some of you may have read my previous post about how terrible my first day of secondary school went. It left my wondering why i wasn't more nervous about making the change from the primary school I was so in love with. Then i found this and remembered. I had my morning routine all planned out. It should have gone fine.  Enjoy.  Dear Diary...  Gimmie a beat ch boom ch mm ch boom ch Wake up in the morning at a reasonable hour Brush my teeth with some Colgate Have a real nice shower Il make sure all my bags are packed   Ive got to leave at 8 Its my first day I don’t wanna be  late late late My new pencil case is so full  I cant so up the zip All my pencils are sharpened  all my pens have a tip My rubbers still in the cardboard  advertising the shop My shatterproof ruler wont break if  dropped dropped dropped i'll walk up to school  with my two best friend

FRENCH TEACHER FROM HELL I had the WORST DAY EVER! It was real lessons and after break i had french BUT ive never had to go to L block before and didnt know where it was the map is STUPID because it doesnt show you which way you're facing. So basically I spent all of break with 'A' queing for a cookie, i know what your thinking but this is a whole new world of cookie. They're melty and squashie and mmmmmm ( If anyone who went to my school read this they would know what I'm talking about. These were literally the best things in the world, so worth giving up your entire break for)  Sorry I was dreaming of cookies. So yeh i got to french literally one minute late because i couldn't find it and the teacher went MENTAL. I wasn't the latest though two girls came in after me and they actually had to sit next to me too because only the back row was left! I actually recognised them from reg, I think they both the gymnastics. They didn't seam to recogni

Dear Diary. First day of 'Big school' So I found a bunch of my old Diary Entries from school recently and it made me think about all the things I wish that I'd known then. After the success of my last post I thought it would be fun to post a few of the actual pages online. I'm literally going to write them up word for word spelling mistakes and all. Anything in Italics is just Current me looking back of Previous Jemma. Also to save face of others I've kept all first names to initials. ENJOY. Today was wicked . Bryn is so much bigger than I remember .. It's so big I've got a map! I think I'm going to glue in into my planner so i don't loose it.  So this morning S&S called for me on the way to school and we all walked up together. I think this was my first day of high school but I'm not really sure how american schools work. I don't think i'm as old as Miley Cyrus and she's in middle school so I'm confused. (I still

So as a teen, I was a little different. I was never a ‘popular’ kid and I had a lot of my own ‘quirks’, i've seen a lot of post recently with people giving advice to their younger selves on how to 'be cool' as a teen. Where to shop, what makeup to wear ect.  For me, this is something i wish I'd just never cared about, so my advice would be the total opposite. At 13, i went from being cute little centre parting, makeup hating tomboy, to this awkward popular wanna-be. I wish i could go back and shake myself.  Don’t try to fit in. I can remember taking a picture of one of the ‘popular’ girls to the hairdressers and asking to get mine cut the same. I’d taken her picture of Bebo and printed it out and I wanted that awkward chopped side fridge all the popular girls were rocking. I looked like a douche. It didn’t suit me at all and to my dismay I still didn’t look like the popular girls. I tried everything to ‘fit in’ and after a while just sort of gave up and ac